Posts Tagged ‘waiting’

Waiting for a Shooting Star

Monday, March 20th, 2017

Waiting around for an alcoholic to decide they have a drinking problem is like waiting for a shooting star to be within your field of view:

It may happen and if it does it’s spectacular!

Most of the time it only happens for a matter of seconds.

You wait and wait around for it to happen again and if you do your odds are better taking home major winnings after spinning a roulette wheel.

Save yourself time and mental anguish.

Let go and let God handle it. You cannot control the outcome of what any person on earth can do except yourself. (more…)

So Stop Waiting

Saturday, October 8th, 2016

So stop waiting until you finish school,
until you go back to school,
until you lose ten pounds,
until you gain ten pounds,
until you have kids,
until your kids leave the house,
until you start work,
until you retire,
until you get married,
until you get divorced,
until Friday night,
until Sunday morning,
until you get a new car or home,
until your car or home is paid off,
until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter,
until you are off welfare,
until the first or fifteenth,
until your song comes on,
until you’ve had a drink,
until you’ve sobered up,
until you die,
until you are born again
to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy…

Author Unknown

Waiting for Something from Another Person

Monday, September 1st, 2014

The best advice for people who can’t seem to end an unsatisfying relationship might be to stop waiting for something from the other person.

Probably what it is will never come.

Thomas Moore

No Contact

10 minutes

Wednesday, August 13th, 2014

What can you do with 10 minutes when there is absolutely nothing else to do but wait…

Several weeks ago I had to pick up a prescription for my dog at a Walmart pharmacy. I was there at 1o minutes before the pharmacy opened.

I needed to get to work right after I picked up his medication so figured I’d better stay put in line so I’d be first once they opened.

I stood there waiting and realizing while I waited that I had 10 minutes to do nothing.

At first I thought, oh brother, 10 minutes with nothing to do but wait.

But then I thought, hmmm, 10 minutes with nothing to do but wait.

So I looked around at the displays within my viewing range–really looked and thought, this isn’t bad at all. It’s actually kind of nice to just stand in a line with absolutely nothing to do but look around.

It forced me to take notice of things I might not pay attention to otherwise and while I was noticing nothing in particular I did notice something in particular that I really needed–a magnifying 10x mirror. The one I’d had cracked on a rafting trip two months ago and I’d been carrying it around in my purse ever since. Lately I’d been thinking about replacing it but never remembered to whenever I was in a store.

Now my problem was solved. The mirror display was two steps from where I was standing so I snatched one up.

That 10 minute wait at the pharmacy turned out to be a gift. A time to stop for 10 minutes and pay attention. I didn’t need to do one other thing, or be anywhere else. All I needed to do was be still be present and take notice.

No Contact

Stop Waiting

Sunday, August 10th, 2014

The best advice for people who can’t seem to end an unsatisfying relationship might be to stop waiting for something from the other person.

Probably what it is will never come.

Thomas Moore

No Contact

Waiting for Something?

Thursday, September 26th, 2013

The best advice for people who can’t seem to end an unsatisfying relationship might be to stop waiting for something from the other person.

Probably what it is will never come.

Thomas Moore

No Contact

A New Relationship on the Heels of an Old One

Wednesday, April 17th, 2013

Sometimes people leave one relationship and before you know it, have entered a new one. Being barely out of one relationship and then sliding into a new one is a slippery slope to climb. It’s hard to be emotionally available for a new partner when there hasn’t been enough time to move past the old one.

Where is the breathing room? What happens to the time it takes to think and heal?

It may be uncomfortable to be without a partner but feeling your way along–alone for awhile is not a bad thing. It takes time patience and a willingness to face loss in order to heal. There isn’t a need to bring another person into the picture to help you through the process. A new relationship partner just adds another layer you’re not ready for. Any new person you meet may wonder why you even find it necessary to start something new so soon.

Healing happens over time. Rushing into new relationships postpones healing.

It doesn’t matter if the relationship left was the world’s worst—healing is still necessary.

It doesn’t matter if the relationship was loveless—there still needs to be time to understand why you were there.

Consider the time you spend without a relationship as an investment in you. Healing makes us stronger and wiser. We grow, develop, and learn from each person that comes into our lives. Friends and family can be of great help after a breakup. They can provide companionship and help you stabilize as you move forward on your own.

Whether the relationship you left lasted a month, six months, a year or ten, the time and effort you put into your healing will provide you with peace and well being down the road.

Pivotal Moments in Destructive Relationships

Sunday, May 27th, 2012

When you think about the pivotal moments in life the big ones come up first—graduating from high school, getting into college, graduating from college, getting the first job, meeting your life partner, marriage, buying a home, having children.

Those are definitely big moments but there are others happening daily which lead us toward or away from who we are as people. We can choose a path that leads us in a direction where although not perfect, we feel good about. It’s a place with people, choices, daily life, events, and opportunities that are in line with our values. Movement on this path may take on a two steps forward one step back characteristic. Instant gratification isn’t typically part of the landscape but when followed this path usually produces satisfying results.

We also have the option of a path which is more exploratory and quite different from what we’ve experienced. This is a tricky path to navigate because on one hand it is unfamiliar, on the other it is exciting interesting and fun. It can even feel like we’ve hit the jackpot and can’t believe our good fortune.

Relationships we develop down this lesser known path initially seem good. They start quickly and appear to be all we could hope for.  Yet after a little time we discover things we may have overlooked at the onset. We may experience a sinking feeling thinking we’re not good enough or exciting enough for a new partner who is suddenly restless. We don’t know what we did or didn’t do to get to this point but we’re scrambling to figure out what we can do to make things right. We might observe questionable behavior–like ranting or off the wall rudeness toward us or others. Decisions are made which don’t make sense.

When we question circumstances in these relationships we’re doing something good—we’re recognizing pivotal moments and it’s up to us to figure out what we’re going to do with the information we’ve been handed. Do we ignore it or do we take action by asking questions, listening, stating our feelings, and if necessary, leaving.

If you aren’t sure about a current relationship think about the following:

Question why you feel uneasy

Decide if you are willing to compromise your values to meet those of your partner.

Determine whether or not you can continue to live with the situation and the person. If you know you can’t let them know and exit.

Recognize if you’re saying you’re okay with things as they are but know deep down you’re not. It is not wise to accept the unacceptable to keep a relationship going.

Give yourself credit for knowing when a relationship is and  isn’t right for you.

 

Waiting

Monday, June 20th, 2011

I realized today how short life really is. It goes by in the blink of an eye…

If we wait too long to treat ourselves with love and compassion we may forget to do it altogether. No kidding, it happens.

I bought myself a mirror for my blank living room wall this past weekend. I’d been staring at that blank wall four years and decided it was time for a change; time to give that wall a focal point. I’d been waiting and thinking about the right thing and then decided I may never find the right thing and what the wall needed was something, anything; so I bought a mirror, hung it up and it looks great!

I tend to wait way too long to do simple things for myself. After I bought my first computer it took me three months to take it out of the box. Three months! I kept thinking… I’ve got to read the instructions and I want to understand all this new information… but really, I just wanted to savor every moment. I looked forward to taking each component out of its box and reading each instruction.  This wasn’t rocket science but I needed to feel that all conditions were right in my mind before I opened the boxes and set it up. .

I bought a pair of boots for myself a couple of years ago. I absolutely loved those boots yet it took me four months to actually wear them.  Every morning I’d see them in the closet and thought about wearing them but then would decide it wasn’t the right time or I didn’t have the right clothes or the weather conditions weren’t quite right…it was always something until one day I thought, if not now, when? So, I put them on, they fit like a glove, and I’ve been wearing them ever since.

I’m learning that it’s okay to treat myself well. Nothing bad is going to happen if I bring myself a little joy.  The sky won’t fall and all will be well but it’s been  a learning process for me to get past all the waiting. Maybe I love the anticipation… The most recent PC I bought was actually up and running the day it was delivered to the door although my son had quite a bit to do with that. He said, Mom come on, lets just set it up now and not wait. And he was right; why wait? No reason to deprive myself or him of something we could enjoy now instead of later.

As I said, I’m learning.

Gifts

Wednesday, November 17th, 2010

A few weeks back I decided to make a little book for my grandson who will be four in a week.

The book is entitled The Magic Soup Book.

My 18 year old son said “dumb idea for a book.”

Still, I kept going with it. I convinced myself that my 18 year old is pretty critical of many things I do so decided to keep working on it and finished up today.

It is a book with pictures of family members and talk about why soup is magic…like–it’ makes you feel better when you’re sick or another one–it warms you up on the inside with a picture of me and my dog standing in front of a lamp where rays of light appear to be radiating around us.

I’m hoping my grandson will see the book as fun and like the fact that there is a picture of him and other family in it. Besides,  as a whole,  I think four year olds tend to be a fairly forgiving group.

If I waited until the book was perfect chances are it would be a project  gathering dust and for me–I like completion.

It’s close to Thanksgiving–the giving season is upon us.

I love to give and want to give gifts that I think the receiver will like while at the same time not worrying about the gift being perfect.

Trying to be perfect and/or give perfection is too hard to maintain over time.

If I received popcorn and sparkling apple cider it would make my day.

This blog post ain’t perfect but I believe it’s worth sharing and hope you enjoy it.

So, what about you? What imperfect gift have you given or received?  For me, the imperfect gifts are the ones I treasure.