Posts Tagged ‘relief’

When Anxiety Hits

Wednesday, June 21st, 2017

When anxiety hits it feels like there is nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.

You need to run and release what’s inside but you have absolutely no idea where to go and how to do it.

If you have a nearby open space you could run and scream the feelings out but that’s not an option for most of us. Breathing through the deep feelings of despair can sometimes help.

Deep anxiety can be agonizing. A loss will trigger anxiety like nothing else can.

Whether it be a loss of a love relationship through separation, divorce, death, the loss of a parent or child, the loss of another dear family member, friend, beloved pet, the loss of a job, or a home, or the loss of health, the loss can be overwhelming.If you manage it with medication–and you may very well feel the need to at first–the pain will eventually come back because substances can only deaden the pain of loss for so long.

If the anxiety is severe find a way to relief quickly before your emotions mow you down.

Seek medical advice immediately if in crisis.

Breathe in and out slowly.

Talk to someone you know and trust.

Walk or run it out.

Talk to yourself, kindly.

Seek counsel as soon as possible.

Take care of you first and foremost.

No Contact

Locked Up or Locked Out?

Sunday, February 26th, 2017

No Contact Warning, if you are offended by talk of breastfeeding you may want to move past the first few paragraphs.

Have you ever been locked up or locked out?

The other day I had a window treatment consultation with a customer who is a lactation consultant and it got it me to thinking of the experience I’d had with my last son who nursed for an extended period of time.
For the most part it was a great breastfeeding experience but there was a point when I got a breast infection which was a truly painful experience.

There was not much I could do to relieve the pain–my son’s nursing provided some relief but it wasn’t enough and I was miserable. I felt locked up. I didn’t have the right key to break the stronghold the infection had on me and the only way to get long lasting relief was to take an antibiotic. Once I got on the medication I found relief and ceased the locked up feeling I’d had.

Being locked up in the case of a breast infection is painful but there are other ways we get locked up or locked out, for instance:

Have you ever had a case of the nerves to the point where your words are locked up? I mean you may get some croaking verbalization to come out but it is truly difficult and silence is a better alternative. I had this happen once in an interview situation and no amount of water or deep breathing brought relief. I somehow croaked my way through but it was rough….

Have you ever been locked out of your car house or apartment? Locked out of your place of business or unable to open a combination lock?

Last week I couldn’t get my garage door to open. I entered the code, no luck, nothing. The back gate lock wouldn’t budge due to very cold conditions and swelling of the wood. I couldn’t get the front door to open because the deadbolt has a mind of it’s own and at that particular time no amount of leaning in or pulling out to get it to open would work.

Then out of the blue, the garage door opened on it’s own–must have been a radio frequency issue–but I was finally able to get inside.

Being closed out is tough and when it happens it affects us mightily. We can be locked out of jobs, promotions, all sorts of opportunities because there is something we need and don’t have or some intangible that we are missing. In the case of an entry to a house, vehicle, gate, etc we can get the right key or code and then relief is ours.

In the case of a job, promotion, or desired opportunity, being locked out could last awhile.

If it’s possible to get what we need like a license, certification, award, etc. we know what we need to do.

But it may be that this one thing we need to unlock our locked out conditions may not come to us.

Alexander Graham Bell said it best:

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one that has opened for us.”

Feeling locked up whether it be breastfeeding, your words, incarceration, or another way, relief comes through a process–whatever that may be…

If you are locked out, move forward, find a way to appreciate the door standing in front of you that is open.

When You’ve Got Something to Say…

Sunday, December 13th, 2015

When you’ve got something to say

Say it straight up.

If you dance around whatever

it is you’ll end up with

something watered down that

doesn’t really get to the heart

and soul of the subject.

If you can’t spit it out keep it to

yourself until you feel

you’ll burst or relieved you held

your tongue.

Once you’ve said your piece own and

accept it; don’t shy away from it feel

embarrassed or have regrets.

Timing isn’t everything it’s only half of it.

The other half is confidence

and the belief that you have the right to express your feelings.

Keep it clear keep it clean keep it respectful

And say it.

No Contact





Relationship Links to Freedom

Wednesday, November 26th, 2014

Breaking free from a destructive relationship is never easy but once you’ve made the decision to leave there is likely a huge sense of relief.
By leaving a destructive partnership you’re creating possibility for new opportunities and positive connections to emerge. It’s not necessarily immediate but over time it’s possible to build great new relationships based on shared values interests and chemistry. All the connections you build with a variety of people will create links to your new life.
I found it difficult to break old links especially with my partner. I started and stopped quite a few times before I was finally able to see that as long as I held onto any connection with him, I wouldn’t be able to break free and move forward.
Creating new links can prove to be challenging especially if you’re not practiced at paying attention to what you’re mind and body tell you. I questioned my ability to know a good link from a bad one and was also pretty impatient. I wanted new connections to happen fast but it took much longer than I had anticipated it would. Eventually I discovered something else–new connections are much harder to make if I’m not fully immersed in my own life. I’ve got to be focused on what I’m doing, creating and building. If my only goal is to find a new relationship partner but ignore or don’t give enough time to other areas of my life, how good a partner will I be to another person?
Life is about living fully on a daily basis. It does no good to spend your time waiting for what you don’t have. It’s a much better plan to focus on the life you’ve got and be ready for opportunities as they arise.
If you’re like me and not too comfortable with uncertainty but instead desire predictability order and organization, think of your life as an adventure–where you’re open to what you’ve never had.
The greatest links to freedom come when we open ourselves up to something we’ve never experienced before. Maybe the ideal life we’ve conjured up in our minds holds us back and keeps us stuck. Say you’ve refused certain characteristics or geographic locations in partners–like you may only want tall with dark hair who live within a twenty mile radius.
You might think you’re options are limited in terms of careers when it’s very possible there are some you’ve never even considered that you’d do well with.What about you’re connections with others? Maybe you’ve limited your friendships to just a few because some others you’ve met just seem too different from you.
Why not give yourself the opportunity to open up, seek out, and expand your comfort zone?
Each of us has challenges when it comes to reaching out and finding links. Linking is important enough that we’ve got to find a way to overcome our limitations and seek out different, discover new, and get out of our own way.
There is a chance we may surprise ourselves and have the time of our lives in the process.

No Contact


Money Gets in the Way of Opportunity

Tuesday, August 26th, 2014

As a business owner & employer I’ve learned a few things about the hold that money has on people.

I’ve learned that good money isn’t necessarily synonymous with a good opportunity.

In fact money may keep you locked in golden handcuffs preventing you from a great opportunity.

I’ve learned that for many people the joy of learning is dependent on the amount of money that’s in it.

If the money isn’t enough; the learning becomes less than joyful.

If the money isn’t enough more people will leave a good opportunity for a lesser opportunity just because they can make more money quicker.

Many people will choose misery in a job they hate if the money payoff is high enough.

The amount of money a person makes has more to do with how they feel about themselves than just about anything else.

A person may say that money isn’t everything but when it comes right down to it for many–it’s pretty darn close.

It takes guts to walk away from money.

It takes guts to walk toward opportunity.

It takes guts to walk toward opportunity when the payoff is unknown.

It takes guts to love what you do even though the initial payoff is low.

Peace of mind comes to those who love what they do for the pure joy of it despite the money they get for the work they do.

It takes maturity to know that the more you do something you love the less desire there is to find work that provides a better payoff.

Some of the happiest people I’ve ever met are the ones who have chosen to live with less in the way of things while being bountiful in the way of joy.

It takes wisdom to understand that opportunity trumps money every single time.

No Contact







Resolutions to Reflect on the Good You Already Do

Tuesday, January 1st, 2013

It’s a new year and with it are the resolutions to try harder  or do something more or better than we did last year.

What if we don’t stop striving for improvement but in addition give ourselves a break by reflecting on what we already do well.

Just think of the relief in knowing that you’re already doing a good job. Sure there’s always room for improvement but there is already plenty of emphasis put on doing more better faster.

Why not have resolutions more in line with breathe easier live calmer and you’re already doing a heck of a job?

Give yourself a break. Take time for you.

The time we take for ourselves and our families are the gifts we get in life. These moments are the best that life has to offer.

Happy New Year!



In the Blink of an Eye

Sunday, November 4th, 2012

As you know, life goes by in the blink of an eye.

If there is something you want to do, do it.

If there is someone you want to see, find a way to see that person.

If you have a strong interest you’ve thought about pursuing but have never gone further than thinking about it, take the next step.

If you have something you want to say, say it now.

Once you take that next step, whatever it is, the relief you feel will be enormous.

Life will look a little different just because you stepped out and took a chance.

We never know how many days we have.

Live each day fully.

Detoxing from Divorce

Thursday, March 8th, 2012