Posts Tagged ‘relationships’

Look Within First

Friday, August 11th, 2017

No ContactWe get into destructive relationships with other people places things

because we are looking for something outside ourselves that will make

us feel better about who we are. The construction of our being turns destructive.

We’ll feel better about who we are when we find what we need from within.

As we erect our solid foundation we are better equipped to contribute

to meaningful and rewarding relationships.

Other people add variety fun and emotional fulfillment.

They add spice and flavor.

You don’t need  people places and things who destroy what you’ve  constructed.

If you think you need what someone else has look deeper.

You have all you need.

We’re always going to be a work in progress.

We add onto take away from and fine tune our  state of being on a daily basis.

Keep the basic blueprint; it’s got you this far and won’t fail you.

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When Anxiety Hits

Wednesday, June 21st, 2017

When anxiety hits it feels like there is nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.

You need to run and release what’s inside but you have absolutely no idea where to go and how to do it.

If you have a nearby open space you could run and scream the feelings out but that’s not an option for most of us. Breathing through the deep feelings of despair can sometimes help.

Deep anxiety can be agonizing. A loss will trigger anxiety like nothing else can.

Whether it be a loss of a love relationship through separation, divorce, death, the loss of a parent or child, the loss of another dear family member, friend, beloved pet, the loss of a job, or a home, or the loss of health, the loss can be overwhelming.If you manage it with medication–and you may very well feel the need to at first–the pain will eventually come back because substances can only deaden the pain of loss for so long.

If the anxiety is severe find a way to relief quickly before your emotions mow you down.

Seek medical advice immediately if in crisis.

Breathe in and out slowly.

Talk to someone you know and trust.

Walk or run it out.

Talk to yourself, kindly.

Seek counsel as soon as possible.

Take care of you first and foremost.

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High Anxiety

Sunday, June 18th, 2017

High anxiety kills relationships.

High anxiety can kill you.

Every day you live in high anxiety is

One less day you fully live.

You render yourself extinct with fear.

Limit your anxiety with any method that works for you.

An anxiety reliever that comes from the actions you take

Rather than from what you ingest is worth its weight in gold.

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Woman Wants to Save her Sister

Tuesday, January 20th, 2015

Woman wants to save her sister from the pain of destructive relationships.

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Positive Self Talk

Friday, September 12th, 2014

Being in destructive relationships includes the one you’re in with yourself. When you have been put down, badgered, belittled, ignored, or physically, emotionally, mentally, or sexually abused, it is easy to believe that you cannot do anything right or are not as good as others.

It is easy to think this way because at some point in your life or maybe throughout life you have listened to others who have told you that you are some how defective or are missing something and because of this will always  fail.

If whatever you believe, whatever recording you play over and over in your mind is negative, that noise can be deafening.  Silence the noise by playing a new recording–one that is positive uplifting and accurate. Memorize this recording and play it loud. Write it out and stick it to a wall where you will see it every day.

Start playing the new recording today. Play it over and over until you believe it. When the old negative recording starts to creep back into your thoughts focus on drowning it out with the new vibrant positive one.

Instead of being your own worst enemy concentrate on being your best friend.

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Don’t Let Digs Get You Down

Tuesday, May 27th, 2014

If someone throws a dig at you face the remark squarely.

If someone throws a dig your way, ask the questions you need to ask.

You will lose sleep, get depressed, get down on yourself if you don’t get to the bottom of whatever it is that was said.

The worst question is the one not asked.

Relationships are ruined by things that are left unsaid and in particular, the unasked questions.

If you don’t get an answer press to get one.

If it’s not safe to press, question why you are still around.

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If it’s not safe to press you are likely not where you need to be.


Egocentrics Destroy Relationships

Sunday, November 24th, 2013

Selfishness, self-centeredness, egotism, narcissism, call it what you want when a person feels the world revolves around their wants and needs. Being in a relationship with an egocentric person makes for an unemotional existence.  One thing you can always count on is that your needs and wants don’t count.

Egocentrics drain you dry and to survive you’ve got to pull away emotionally and physically. People who stay in a relationship with this type of person for financial and family reasons pay a very high price in the lack of emotional fulfillment.

The narcissist believes that the world must revolve around them. They are frustrated, angry, and irrational when they don’t get what they want. For their partner who desires a meaningful relationship, it feels like being on an empty battlefield. You know you’re in the fight of your life but your words go unheard, your feelings unnoticed. You’ll likely wonder,  “why am I here”?

It is vital for your future health and happiness that you recognize a selfish egotist early on in a new relationship. These people are usually quite charming initially so look beneath this facade when seeking a lasting relationship.

They will take center stage, demand constant attention, and when their needs aren’t met make sure you know that it is your responsibility to see that they are.

Egocentric people like to discredit others in order to make themselves appear better. Be aware of this because what they do with others they will also do with you when the situation warrants it. (more…)

She Chooses Destructive Relationships

Saturday, September 28th, 2013

I once read an open question over the web where a young woman asks if it’s self-destructive to try and get into destructive relationships.

She feels that nice guys are a total turn off but the ones who treat her poorly are quite desirable.

She wanted to know is this is considered self-destructive.

She got three answers to her question and each answer affirmed that yes, this is definitely not healthy!

Why would anyone choose to be treated like a doormat?

Why would you choose, if given a choice, a cruel and disrespectful person over a decent kind and nurturing type?

Some where along the line I suppose you choose pain because anything else seems foreign.

Here’s the full text of the open question:

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Love & Cement

Monday, September 2nd, 2013

If grass can grow through cement, love can find you at every time in your life.


Begging for Attention

Monday, August 12th, 2013

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