Posts Tagged ‘life’

The Price

Thursday, June 21st, 2018

No ContactWhether you’re getting the price or giving it there is one brief moment where all eyes are focused on that number and there is this palatable pause.

There is a stillness.

There is quiet.

There is focus.

Valuable information is being imparted and for that one brief moment life actually takes a breather.

This moment is about more than the sale. It’s about the pause, the connection with another person.

When we create these moments in life we are taken away from the high-speed chaos we’ve grown accustomed to.

We have this moment where we are not jumping ahead to the next thing because the thing that is in front of us is where our focus lies.

We need more of these moments. In fact we need to be these moments. Just imagine if each conversation we have with another person is one we are totally tuned into. Nothing else is pulling us. Nothing else is distracting us. We are right in tune with this other person in the here and now.

We can do this because we need these connections. We need to feel that our words are valued so much that the person we are in conversation with is giving us their undivided attention.

We need to give others our undivided attention. They will notice the difference. We will notice the difference. Life will change. In fact, the others you know might wonder, they might be curious, they will pause at the very real difference they feel in your presence.

Let’s do it!

Let’s live it!

The price we pay for not listening and not being listened to is HIGH. The reward we all receive for listening and being listened to is immeasurable.

Love & Devotion to Self

Saturday, April 14th, 2018

No ContactDevotion to self is pretty easy when things are going well. Being present with love & devotion to self when stressed is something entirely different.

In my line of work I spend most of my time being out in the customer’s home. For the most part I can tell myself I’m going to have a great day and keep that self talk going. I need to do this because sales is a tough job and can get discouraging because there are multiple challenges and rejection to face on a regular basis. I know that’s part of the job and I accept it.

However

There are times when no amount of self talk is going to save me. When I’m hungry and tired and in a customer’s home with another hour or so to go it can be hard to cope.

But the one thing that drives me nuts is when I can’t find a pen!!

I have lots of pens–but due to the hectic nature of the work, pens disappear. This is a problem when it comes to taking measurements and writing up invoices. A few weeks back I couldn’t find a pen so I ended up borrowing one from the customer wrote out the invoice and finished the consult.

As challenges go not having a pen is not a gigantic one yet it can be unnerving in a sales situation because having a pen is important. In the moment my head scolds me telling me how unprofessional it makes me look not to have one. On the other hand I tell myself it makes me look human so I step back, take a deep breath and give myself some grace.

So the point to this is:

I really concentrated on not beating myself up over not having a pen but instead with determination found an old zipper pouch and stashed quite a few pens in it. I also ended up getting a better bag–one with more storage compartments.

When things don’t go exactly like you want them to but you’ve got your heart into what you do, know that it is enough. In fact, you’re likely doing an amazing job at what you do but fail to see how spectacular you really are.

The goal isn’t to be perfect but to be perfectly fine with yourself.

If we don’t challenge ourselves to love us by taking a stand for who we are and what we do in life–deep down we know it.

Being devoted to self is the key to living life the way we are meant to live it in all aspects of life. Love who you are always. Think thoughts that allow positive forces to be at the top of your mind. Really let positive thoughts rule in your life. Kick the thoughts that don’t serve you to the curb and keep them there. One method I’ve found that works is picking up an imaginary shovel full of dirt and burying pesky negativity from the past. Once it’s buried it’s gone. If it comes back I get the shovel out again. I also use an imaginary detonator and explode the thought out of my consciousness. If It comes back I detonate again.

The biggest challenge we face is loving ourselves. We don’t have to do life perfectly we just need to live life and love ourselves unconditionally.

Ask for What You Want

Sunday, April 1st, 2018

Like everyone else, there have been times when I’ve felt sorry for myself because I don’t have what I want. But when I’m honest with myself, really honest, I realize that if I don’t have what I want it’s because I don’t ask for it.

For all of us, the way to get what we truly want in life is not all that difficult. But on the other hand we might not get what we want as quickly as we would hope to get it.

When we are straightforward and ask for what we want we might get it and then again we might not. Yet even if we don’t we will learn something in the process. We will find out what we need to do to give us the best opportunity next time around. And if we want whatever it is we want badly enough, there will be a NEXT time because we are centered and focused on providing ourselves with the best opportunities life has to offer.

There really is no need to set ourselves up scheme or plot.

There is a need however to be purposeful in the way we live our lives and really know with every fiber of our being what it is we truly want because the law of life is that we don’t just fall into the right circumstances and situations.

We prepare ourselves to get there.

We’ve got to have a map because that map will lead us to our destination.

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Trust

Sunday, July 9th, 2017

Trust yourself first.

If you don’t follow your gut and follow your basic instincts who do you think you should be listening to?

Is there someone out there who knows all the answers to make your life easier to live?

Is there another person you know who knows everything there is to know about you better than you?

And even if there was an all knowing individual out there who you consider to be the supreme know-it-all about you and you did everything they told you to do, would the results be any better than what you create for yourself?

You need to trust yourself first and foremost. Many of us who have been in abusive and otherwise disappointing relationships have had great difficulty trusting ourselves. Many of us learned in childhood that we couldn’t trust our hearts, our thoughts, our instincts, nothing. We were led to believe that we didn’t have any idea what was best for us and so because of this have struggled in adulthood to reverse this self defeating mindset.

If we all trusted ourselves deeply on the inside rather than seeking outward advice and approval there would be less pain and suffering and more joy. When we seek answers from outside ourselves we get into trouble because we lose who we are. We’ve got the answers; we’ve just got to trust that we do!

I have spent years of my life in difficult relationships and in some instances put myself and my family in danger because I refused to listen to my gut. It took me far longer than it ever should have to extricate myself from painful relationships simply because I refused to consistently pay attention to my instincts.

If you have related to others who have led you to believe you can’t trust in you, distance yourself from these people or if that’s not possible, stand up to them by standing up and acknowledging the power within you.

People who tell you you don’t know what you are talking about or that you didn’t see what you saw or didn’t hear what you heard, or don’t know what you know to be true are gas lighting you and that practice is insidious.

People who do this will wear you down so be prepared to consistently resist their attempts to throw you off track. Come back to you and ask yourself if what you heard feels right to you or if it feels off. If it feels off accept that it does, don’t question that! Do question the other person though. Ask them hard questions. Ask them the questions you’re afraid to ask because you don’t want to rock the boat. Ask them the questions that you know you need to ask. Let them know who you are. If you are afraid to ask the hard questions or don’t want to let them know who you really are and what you really want, why in the world would you want to continue on with this person?

As you gain momentum and consistently maintain your power from within, you will find that those others who want you to cast doubt in yourself start distancing themselves from you OR they will straighten up their act. Don’t however, hold your breath as they are not likely to clean up their game to keep you in their life. It’s too easy to find other people who will easily and willingly become their prey.

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Start with You

Monday, June 26th, 2017

Start with you.

There is absolutely nowhere else for your life to start. It all starts inside.You are the only one that can change what is going on.

If you think for one minute that your peace, happiness, security, sense of self, and esteem come from outside yourself, it will not happen.

Other people are not put on earth to bolster, boost, or provide you security. Only you can do that for yourself.

No one else can make things better and even if they could how would that create a better life for you?

You are not a clinging vine hanging on for dear life. Your roots are deep within and need to be nurtured for you to grow and branch out.

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Give Yourself Reprogramming

Thursday, May 25th, 2017

If you believe life will not get better and that you do not have what it takes to move forward successfully in relationships, career, or in any other way it’s time to give yourself a reprogramming.

Being in destructive relationships includes the one you’re in with yourself. When you have been put down, badgered, belittled, ignored, or physically, emotionally, mentally, or sexually abused, it is easy to believe that you cannot do anything right or are not as good as others.

It is easy to think this way because at some point in your life or maybe throughout life you have listened to others who have told you that you are some how defective or are missing something and because of this will always  fail.

If whatever you believe and/or whatever recording you play over and over in your head is negative that noise can be deafening.  Silence the noise by playing a new recording–one that is positive uplifting and accurate. Memorize this recording and play it loud. Write it out and stick it to a wall where you will see it every day. So for instance, if the recording you play is: I’m a loser and will never ever make it in life; change it to: I am smart and strong and I will have a great life!

Start playing the new recording today. Play it over and over until you believe it. When the old negative recording starts to creep back into your thoughts focus on drowning it out with the new vibrant positive one.

Instead of being your own worst enemy concentrate on being your best friend. Don’t let ghosts from the past and naysayers in the present have power over the way you view yourself!

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Know Where You Are Going

Wednesday, January 11th, 2017

You can’t know where you are going if you don’t know where you are.

I’m sure you’re saying….yeah, and tell me something I don’t know.

Seriously, people can be physically at a place in life and have no idea how or why they are there.

Sometimes we might feel that forces beyond our control place us in certain locations at certain times and to some extent that is true.

But to move forward we have to have an understanding of where we are in the present otherwise we will move forward impulsively instead of strategically.

Going on a whim and a prayer is risky.

Know where you want to go based on a plan.

It doesn’t matter what you’re doing now.

It doesn’t matter where you’ve been.

Your age doesn’t matter unless you are not well and/or have a disabling condition that forces you to look at your safety as it relates to your health.

Think through any major change you want to make because it will change your life and the results might not be what you thought they would be. If you plan ahead you will be better prepared.

Think about where you are now. Take inventory. Evaluate. Note the good and the bad and what you would like to see happen in your future.

There is no one who knows your circumstances as well as you do. Believe that and plan accordingly.

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Downturn to an Upswing

Wednesday, March 23rd, 2016

You know that a downturn cannot last forever.

When a downturn hits rock bottom

the only place to go from the bottom is

up!

Beginning the ascent into an upswing is pretty gradual–subtle even,

but it does come.

And when it does you will think back to the downturn

and realize the significance of having experienced all that

you did.

The appreciation of an upswing can truly be felt after living

through the downturns in life.

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Can’t Win Without Losing

Monday, March 21st, 2016

Winning is great, sure, but if you are really going to do something in life, the secret is learning how to lose. Nobody goes undefeated all the time. If you can pick up after a crushing defeat, and go on to win again, you are going to be a champion some day. Wilma Rudolph

Just For One Second

Tuesday, December 22nd, 2015

“[F]or just one second, look at your life and see how perfect it is. Stop looking for the next secret door that is going to lead you to your real life. Stop waiting. This is it: there’s nothing else. It’s here, and you’d better decide to enjoy it or you’re going to be miserable wherever you go, for the rest of your life, forever.”
Lev Grossman, The Magicians

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