Posts Tagged ‘hope’

Uncomfortable

Tuesday, December 15th, 2015

The number one reason I was able to finally leave the destructive relationships I found myself in was that I forced myself to get used to uncomfortable.

The thing that keeps us in what isn’t good for us is that even though we know it’s not good, we’re familiar with it and know how to live in it.

It may not be good but getting up day after day and knowing what to expect even if it’s bad gives us a sense of normalcy that we crave.

One of the first big decisions I made when I left my marriage was to buy a new home.

Walking into the realtor’s office by myself felt very uncomfortable.

I felt like a fish out of water and completely alone.

It seemed so abnormal to make the big decision I was about to make.

I thought–I can’t do this and shouldn’t be here. I need  help!

But there I was and looking around I realized I was the only one there to make the decision and it had to be done;

so I did it.

I felt less uncomfortable as I walked out of that office.

I felt uncomfortable with more decisions I made in the coming weeks months and years but I got used to making decisions and as time went on realized that the only way to get comfortable was to continue to make decisions–small medium and big ones.

The result was that over time the uncomfortableness I’d felt early on became my new comfort zone.

I trusted the decisions I was making.

Other people saw the difference in me–the confidence that came through.

I would not have grown into the person I am today without forcing myself to get uncomfortable.

Next time you think–oh no, I can’t do this or this is way too big a decision for me to make–

think again.

Get used to it.

Accept it.

Own your decisions.

Your time is now.

No Contact

 

Ending Violence Against Women & Children

Tuesday, October 30th, 2012

http://bit.ly/Rt356G

Crisis Center in Need of Funds for Repairs

Wednesday, April 11th, 2012

http://bit.ly/IpJX3M

Risk

Wednesday, January 4th, 2012

To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.          Unknown

Get Involved If You’re Feeling Overwhelmed

Sunday, November 27th, 2011

When you do nothing you feel overwhelmed and powerless. But when you get involved, you feel the sense of hope and accomplishment that comes from knowing you are working to make things better.       Unknown

Try It One More Time

Monday, November 21st, 2011

When the world says, “Give Up,” Hope whispers, “Try it one more time.”

Unknown

Stargazers

Monday, September 6th, 2010

There is precious little hope to be got out of whatever keeps us industrious, but there is a chance for us whenever we cease work and become stargazers.    H.M. Tomlinson

Time & Focus to Make the Decision to Leave

Monday, July 26th, 2010

There are a couple of  reasons people might stay in destructive relationships.

One being time and the other being focus.

You might think you want out but don’t have time to focus on the decision.

When are you going to take the time? It will take a concerted effort to leave and with each day full of routines and challenges that need to be attended to it’s sometimes hard to fully focus on your decision.

Another possible hurdle is if your partner senses you are having serious doubts about continuing and suddenly becomes more in tune with you and the relationship. You might think, how can I possibly leave now? You decide to stay to see if there is hope for the future.  You hope for the opportunity to move toward a working relationship and in some cases  things work out.

Other times the hope dies and you’re back where you were before the new hope cycle emerged. How many more hopeful cycles will you enjoy? How many more down cycles will you endure?

Eventually you may see the hopeful cycles shorter and the down cycles longer. That may be a signal that if you continue to ride this up and down roller coaster your physical mental and emotional well being will be seriously  affected and  in order to create a healthy life for yourself will need to focus on leaving for good.

If you need time in order to focus:

  1. Decide if you’re ready.
  2. Talk your decision over with someone you trust.
  3. Take the time you need to feel confident about your decision.
  4. Seek counseling if it will help you decide what to do.

The time you take is an investment in your future.

Love in Your Heart

Sunday, June 20th, 2010

Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring.   –Oscar Wilde

Tuesday, May 4th, 2010

Restlessness and discontent are the necessities of progress.   Thomas A. Edison