Posts Tagged ‘girlfriend’

You Might Love ‘Em but Do You Like ‘Em?

Wednesday, August 8th, 2012

Have you ever felt that although you feel love for your partner you really don’t like him or her?

You sure wouldn’t be alone.

It is not uncommon at times to dislike a partner–even a nice partner who treats you well. They could be having a bad day and/or are stressed or maybe both of you are out of sorts, that happens.¬† However if you’ve had or have a partner who is none too nice to begin with life can be hard on a regular basis.

Yesterday I went with my son to a local retail outlet to exchange an item. In front of us was another customer making a return. He tells the clerk he needs to exchange what he bought because his girlfriend’s idiot son broke it (fortunately neither the girlfriend or her son were with him.)

I immediately felt sorry for his girlfriend and her son. I wondered about this guy and how truly loving he could be to either of them. I thought well maybe she loves the guy but how easy is he to like?

There are things that eat away at people for sure but one of the hardest to take day in and out are the jabbing stabbing cruel things people say to those they are closest to. If this man referred to his gf’s child as an idiot to a stranger how would he address him at home?

A piggy bank comes to mind. When someone says something nice they deposit a coin. After enough coins get deposited and the bank is full they break it open and treat themselves. On the other hand, if cruel words are said a coin is taken out. If the cruel words outnumber the nice ones that bank isn’t going to fill up anytime soon.

How is it possible to like let alone love a person who is cruel to you, your children, your parents, siblings, friends, co-workers, or pets?¬† Words sting. You can pretend that words don’t hurt but deep down you”re not fooling anyone and especially not fooling yourself. Eventually love fades and is replaced by a ton of anger and resentment.

You don’t need it and neither do your loved ones.

So what do you do?

For starters you stop taking it.

Let the person know it’s not okay and you will no longer put up with it.

If it continues it’s up to you to decide if you can live another day or more the way you’re living now. Decide if it’s worth your health and that of your family.

As always, if you are in a violent relationship please seek the advice of a professional before making changes in your current situation.

National Domestic Violence Hotline  1-800-799-SAFE.

 

 

 

Navigating New Relationships Can be Tricky

Sunday, August 8th, 2010

Relationships are tricky especially early on when you may be dating more than one person. It’s sometimes hard to know proper protocol when dating and introducing a new friend to others.

The worst thing anyone can do is show a lack of respect for the person they’re dating even though there are times when any disrespect shown is really unintentional.

Say for instance you are on an outing with a dating partner and you run into an acquaintance you haven’t seen for awhile.

This acquaintance says, “Hey, is this your girlfriend?”

You want to acknowledge that yes this is someone you’re dating but don’t want to send a message you’re not ready to deliver.

Don’t say: “Yeah, one of them.” You may think, of course I wouldn’t say that, but believe me, it happens.

Instead you could simply say this is Mary and leave it at that.

Another issue is becoming too comfortable early on in a relationship and taking your partner for granted. If a relationship is new enjoy the newness and keep it interesting. No one wants to me treated as if they are unwanted or unappreciated. No one wants to be treated like baggage. Remember your good fortune in finding such a great person. Relationships that thrive stay alive!

You’ll make mistakes–it comes with the territory. Just do your best to consider the other person and how you would want to be treated.