Posts Tagged ‘cruel’

For Her, Destructive Relationships Desirable

Wednesday, July 2nd, 2014

I once read an open question over the web where a young woman asks if it’s self-destructive to try and get into destructive relationships.

She feels that nice guys are a total turn off but the ones who treat her poorly are quite desirable.

She wanted to know is this is considered self-destructive.

She got three answers to her question and each answer affirmed that yes, this is definitely not healthy!

Why would anyone choose to be treated like a doormat?

Why would you choose, if given a choice, a cruel and disrespectful person over a decent kind and nurturing type?

Some where along the line I suppose you choose pain because anything else seems foreign.

Here’s the full text of the open question:

No Contact

A Word to People Pleasers…

Saturday, August 10th, 2013

You will never please everyone all the time.

You will find that there are people who will misjudge you.

You will find that there are people who will misinterpret things you say and do.

You will find that there are people who speak ill of you to others.

There is not one thing you can do to change the mind of an individual who has misjudged you and refuses to speak to you.

Hold your head up and keep going.

Treat yourself with respect.

Treat others with respect.

Those who have misjudged you will either come around or they won’t. What they do or don’t do is their business, tend to your own business.

Live your life with dignity and grace and above all else do not allow yourself to be pushed around by others.





What Would You Do?

Saturday, February 9th, 2013

The following link sends you to a blog with a post written by a woman who wants to tell her ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend about his abusive behavior.



You Might Love ‘Em but Do You Like ‘Em?

Wednesday, August 8th, 2012

Have you ever felt that although you feel love for your partner you really don’t like him or her?

You sure wouldn’t be alone.

It is not uncommon at times to dislike a partner–even a nice partner who treats you well. They could be having a bad day and/or are stressed or maybe both of you are out of sorts, that happens.¬† However if you’ve had or have a partner who is none too nice to begin with life can be hard on a regular basis.

Yesterday I went with my son to a local retail outlet to exchange an item. In front of us was another customer making a return. He tells the clerk he needs to exchange what he bought because his girlfriend’s idiot son broke it (fortunately neither the girlfriend or her son were with him.)

I immediately felt sorry for his girlfriend and her son. I wondered about this guy and how truly loving he could be to either of them. I thought well maybe she loves the guy but how easy is he to like?

There are things that eat away at people for sure but one of the hardest to take day in and out are the jabbing stabbing cruel things people say to those they are closest to. If this man referred to his gf’s child as an idiot to a stranger how would he address him at home?

A piggy bank comes to mind. When someone says something nice they deposit a coin. After enough coins get deposited and the bank is full they break it open and treat themselves. On the other hand, if cruel words are said a coin is taken out. If the cruel words outnumber the nice ones that bank isn’t going to fill up anytime soon.

How is it possible to like let alone love a person who is cruel to you, your children, your parents, siblings, friends, co-workers, or pets?¬† Words sting. You can pretend that words don’t hurt but deep down you”re not fooling anyone and especially not fooling yourself. Eventually love fades and is replaced by a ton of anger and resentment.

You don’t need it and neither do your loved ones.

So what do you do?

For starters you stop taking it.

Let the person know it’s not okay and you will no longer put up with it.

If it continues it’s up to you to decide if you can live another day or more the way you’re living now. Decide if it’s worth your health and that of your family.

As always, if you are in a violent relationship please seek the advice of a professional before making changes in your current situation.

National Domestic Violence Hotline  1-800-799-SAFE.