Posts Tagged ‘cold treatment’

Helping Our Children Become Better People

Sunday, May 20th, 2012

I should have known better. I knew that my19 year old son’s new work schedule wasn’t working for me.

I was losing sleep because of it.

But it wasn’t until last week that the reality of my decision not to stand firm a year and a half ago finally sunk in.

At 2:30am one mid week morning I woke to the sounds of a motorcycle revving up, the garage door opening and closing, and then a short while later activity in the kitchen. Was it really 2:30am? With all the commotion I would have sworn it was mid-afternoon.

My son works an evening shift–3:30pm to 12am. He has developed a normal routine of bedtime no sooner than 4am and although he typically gives an effort to being quiet mid-last week his effort was sorely lacking.

My words were not firm a year and a half ago. I told him to stop working evening shifts or move but I didn’t follow through.

So yesterday I told my son he would need to work a day shift or move out. There were no if’s, ands, or buts.

He turned in his letter of request for shift change. His evening shift  officially ended four days later.

I wish I would have stood firm sooner but I wasn’t ready.

I waited longer than I should have but when it mattered I did what I needed to do.

It doesn’t work to protect our kids in spite of us.

Life is short. Our kids need to know that they have rights but that they also have responsibilities.

They won’t always get what they want. We can’t always give them what they want–that’s not our job.

Our job is to give them what they need to become better people.

We may get a dirty look, a sigh, the cold shoulder, pouts, etc but at the end of the day we can feel we did our best to form this beautiful young person into a solid individual who is better off because we weren’t afraid to stand firm.