Archive for the ‘Animals’ Category

Try the Lighter Side

Monday, September 22nd, 2014

It’s difficult  to smile when you really just want to cry but it helps heal your heart and mind if you do. Turning a tear into a smile can lift you and keep your spirit from breaking.

As hard as it is, if you are blue and down, find something to do that brings you joy. Read a book, watch a tv show you know makes you smile, call a friend, go to a movie, or play with your pet.  Remember that your child who loves you can’t wait to see your smile.

After you have a setback, suffer a loss, or receive bad news, do your best to allow time to pull through to the lighter side; let it happen.

No Contact

Baby Ducks take a Leap of Faith

Monday, June 3rd, 2013

http://petzter.com/?p=2660

Held Captive

Sunday, June 2nd, 2013

Inside destructive relationships one partner is held captive–this is usually the woman but not always. Partners held in captivity share in the responsibility for this because they allow it. Letting another person take the leading role is often pretty easy to do especially if you feel pulled in many directions. It feels good to let another person slide right into your life and make decisions you don’t want to make and do the things you don’t have time to do–it initially feels like a big relief.

There are other ways a partner can take over. You may let them decide what you’re going to do and where you’re going to go for entertainment. They may make all the plans, find fun things to do, provide your entire social outlet. They might influence you to make a large purchase you would have been more cautious about without their encouragement. They may tell you that you aren’t very smart, don’t know as much as they do, and are better off doing things the way they tell you to do them.

In time you become convinced you’re not capable of reaching goals which are completely attainable deciding that trying is not worth the effort. You slip into state of mind that is not typical of you. Your general outlook is bleak–not at all the way you previously viewed things.

You need to find a way to release yourself from captivity. Find your way back to who you were before the relationship but not only that; it’s important to understand why you allowed yourself to choose this particular relationship partner so that you don’t make the same mistake again. Maybe you have a history of choosing relationship partners who are unhealthy violent and/or physically, mentally, or emotionally abusive. Maybe you are a thrill seeker and choose relationship partners based primarily on attractiveness and excitement.

Our closest relationships enhance our lives–they make life  worth living but  are not meant to define who we are as people. By definition a relationship is a connection, an association, involvement. It doesn’t represent ownership of one person by another. A relationship doesn’t give one person the right to mistreat another human being. Having any relationship is NOT better than being alone. Learning to live on your own and to feel good about who you are as a person is a prerequisite to having a meaningful personal relationship.

If your significant relationship is dragging you downward and it feels unhealthy trust that feeling; don’t dismiss it. Take steps to get back on track and if that means leaving the relationship and you’re determined to end it make sure you have a plan in place to do so.

As always, your safety and that of your family must be your top consideration. Seek help including law enforcement if necessary.

If you are in a domestic violence situation please go to

www.domesticviolence.org or call 1-800-799-7233.

When this happens it’s usually a surprise, not expected at all. This could be because the relationship developed quickly. It can fall apart just as quickly and when it does you’re not prepared for your partner suddenly disappearing or not being as available as they had been.

Once they pull back you become anxious and wait. Wait for them to show up back into your life.

You spend much of your free time either waiting for them, calling them, or trying to find them. Your life is suddenly not interesting and you don’t know what to do to get your partner back into your life and have things as they had been.

No Contact

Talk to a Dog

Friday, September 28th, 2012

When you’re stressed out or overwhelmed with decisions and changes in  your life find a dog to talk to. That dog will look as though he’s listening and the attention you get from that sweet face will make you feel better.

Leadership & Character in Crisis

Wednesday, August 29th, 2012

If you are a dog owner–even if you’re not, this is great food for thought.

http://bit.ly/t7XYJN

 

You Might Love ‘Em but Do You Like ‘Em?

Wednesday, August 8th, 2012

Have you ever felt that although you feel love for your partner you really don’t like him or her?

You sure wouldn’t be alone.

It is not uncommon at times to dislike a partner–even a nice partner who treats you well. They could be having a bad day and/or are stressed or maybe both of you are out of sorts, that happens.  However if you’ve had or have a partner who is none too nice to begin with life can be hard on a regular basis.

Yesterday I went with my son to a local retail outlet to exchange an item. In front of us was another customer making a return. He tells the clerk he needs to exchange what he bought because his girlfriend’s idiot son broke it (fortunately neither the girlfriend or her son were with him.)

I immediately felt sorry for his girlfriend and her son. I wondered about this guy and how truly loving he could be to either of them. I thought well maybe she loves the guy but how easy is he to like?

There are things that eat away at people for sure but one of the hardest to take day in and out are the jabbing stabbing cruel things people say to those they are closest to. If this man referred to his gf’s child as an idiot to a stranger how would he address him at home?

A piggy bank comes to mind. When someone says something nice they deposit a coin. After enough coins get deposited and the bank is full they break it open and treat themselves. On the other hand, if cruel words are said a coin is taken out. If the cruel words outnumber the nice ones that bank isn’t going to fill up anytime soon.

How is it possible to like let alone love a person who is cruel to you, your children, your parents, siblings, friends, co-workers, or pets?  Words sting. You can pretend that words don’t hurt but deep down you”re not fooling anyone and especially not fooling yourself. Eventually love fades and is replaced by a ton of anger and resentment.

You don’t need it and neither do your loved ones.

So what do you do?

For starters you stop taking it.

Let the person know it’s not okay and you will no longer put up with it.

If it continues it’s up to you to decide if you can live another day or more the way you’re living now. Decide if it’s worth your health and that of your family.

As always, if you are in a violent relationship please seek the advice of a professional before making changes in your current situation.

National Domestic Violence Hotline  1-800-799-SAFE.

 

 

 

Domestic Violence Calls Dangerous for Law Enforcement

Saturday, July 28th, 2012

http://bit.ly/LT40ZH